Entries
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Hmmm.... Welcome to the realm of the unknown... for me that is.. heheheh~! This is a message for my beloved boyfriend, who, insyaALLAH i will marry one day...I almost cried when i read your blog. it seems so unfair sometimes.. We are together for almost a year now and i cant hardly believe that either. The friendship that i had received bloomed to such a beautiful relationship. I must admit I have never met anyone more patient with me and in the process, made me more mature. Heck, i even learnt not to be so particular abt certain things. Hahahaha! Many times i almost mindlessly threw my 'gem' out the window in a fit of rage... But i will also admit that many times i was the one who came crawling back... Yet you quietly put up with my temper and tanrums...I guess i was adjusting from "Having to work for love" to "Being loved".... and yes, i was difficult to handle.. i still am anyway... But you brought a new level in my life.. I have never felt more contented and at peace with myself.. I did things which i have long put on hold...(eg: get a gooood job, be financially secure, etc) and I did all those with your support.. You amaze me... And with your $50 story, you made me realise the real worth of a human being... A soldier may have fallen but he is not forgotten~I just wanted you to know that i love you for who you are... Bike or no bike... graf and all... whatever... I got to know Roslan, the simple guy with a big heart and a cheeky smile... That is the Roslan i fell for... The one who made me a stronger person. and loved me for ME! not for my money.... So it does not really matter what you have or do not have koz i dun care anymore... I once told you that you are perfect... and i will stand by my statement...Also, to DILA... (if thats your name koz there are way too may hoes, if you know what i mean).... Thank you.. Really.... For screwing whatever you had with him... I gained from your loss and all i can say is you made a big loss! But who cares... Im sure there are many other males out there who suits you.. be it 2-legged or 4... *winks*So my wish is happiness for anyone, and everyone... And yes, like what my baby said, He can claim as and when He wants... Life is short so make it worthwhile... Leave behind a legacy that your family and offsprings will be proud of... The same way that my children wil be proud of their father...*PeAcE Be UpOn YoU****LyNn ChEmOnG***Love me.... Love my Cat....
Write with no regret
1:07:00 PM
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
Today was the first day of the fasting month for us Muslims..What a day it was over at camp..Not that i was involved in any activities or whatsoever..But there were a lot of things happening here and there..2 people were charged..1 of them rightfully so..Well i wouldn't like to mention names but ZUL..HE DESERVED IT!!hahahah..This typical maggot who speaks highly of himself and doesn't mix with us..Coz he doesn't like the idea of us licking Staff Jamal's boots..Well those boots sure can kick his ass for all i care..Furthermore he's not a team player..Just a pathetic loner and loser..Well he deserved to go into detention barracks for 2 weeks..A bit short for me to think about it..How i wished he could be inside for like 40 days..And miss the first day of Hari Rayawith his family..God knows if he even has one..Maybe his family are a certain group of people who "understands" and "accept" him as who he is..Hahhhh!Fuck that..
Like i was typing,a lot of activities happened at camp..They were having this LRI thinggy going on..A lot of movements here and there..I was involved for a minimum time..Apart from that,it was zzzZzZzzZZz all the time for me..First day of Ramadhan has its effects..Couldn'tunderstand why i was so tired and sleepy whereas on other days i could still take the punishment..Special month..
Somebody at camp told me i was going to have a short life..Boy did that rammed me back to earth..Not that i believed in palm reading or any of those stuffs..If HE wants me now HE will get me now..But suddenly all those synchronized thoughts became disrupted for a little point of time..Suddenly i realised life wasn't that long after all..It wasn't supposed to be in the first place..Us humans just took things for granted..And forgot that we could go back anytime HE wants us to..A scary thought..As much as i want to disperse those thoughts,i cant..For it doesn't only play in my mind..But it plays itself in reality too..Not only me but all of us won't know when we will leave this place no matter how hard we try to..We just can't..We're too weak..That point taken and still humans trying to prove how strong they can get..Just look at the very recent Bali bombings..Wouldn't like to comment much on that as it could get quite sensitive..I just don'tunderstand..And many people won't either..Signs are showing that theworld is indeed coming to an end..It's just a matter of time..And i just have to keep continue doing things that i should have done before..Make preparations for that day to come..
It's Something Unpredictable
But I Hope You Have
The Time Of Your Life
Write with no regret
9:28:00 PM
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Just finished cleaning Balqis up..She sure needed some cleaning here and there..An eventful weekend can be said for me..On Friday night went to my Staff Sergeant's place for some religious event..That night potrayed a different person whom i used to think i could never talk to..He was a simple man..With a lot of burden resting on his shoulders..Saw one of the pictures displayed was a picutre of someone with Down Syndrome..A pity..But questions still lingers to as who it was..His brother?His child?Staff doesn't have any children..And i don't know why..I didn't ask..But there was one picture showing he and his wife carrying a baby not more than 5 months old..And where is that child now?His closest relative that was present was his brother in law..That was what i was told..And so where are HIS siblings?Nowhere in sight..At his home he didn't look menacing..He looked homely..A kind family man..A man whom you could just approach to ask for directions..I still can't figure out to as why he was hated because of either his character or attitude..Whatever it was he did a good job in making it hard for people to work with him..But not to me..Not anymore..The respect that's residing inside has increased without any judder that i thought that might be present..And the way he chortles just signified how gentle he is..He doesn't laugh like a hyena..Just small chortles..A quiet man he is..
Went out early on Saturday..Met akram over at Kembanganto discuss about Balqis..The mechanic there will sort things out..Balqis sure is sick..She chokes when it seemed like i didn't throttle the way i should..It's like Balqis would never let me go slow..Or she will choke and die..And when i turn her on again,i will throttle hard and black smoke will come out from her..Talk about attitude..After Kembangan i accompanied Akram to Geylang as he wanted to look for some particular book he was looking for..Fruitless..Followed him to eat and off i went to my beloved's place..Played the game which i bought for her and damn i was hooked!Played for like nearly an hour before i finallyate her cooking..She cooked some spaghetti and chicken wings..Grilled ones..Yum Yum..Played Sims 2 again and off we went to the graveyard for a little visit..Went went over to my late grandfather's grave first..And over there i asked permission from him to put the ring which was left by him onto my beloved's finger..I had kept that ring and told to myself that one day i'm going to put that ring on my special someone's finger..And i did..Went over to 2 other graves..Which one of them was her Pak Din and another was her late grandfather..She broke down at the latter..She apologized and explained why she wasn't there when her late grandfather left..Apparently her emotions got the better of her..She had an arguement with her x that day and he kind of like wouldn'tlet my beloved see her late grandfather and stuffs..A choice or something like that..And so she didn't get to see her late grandfatherfor the last time..Well fuck people like her x..An egoistic maggot like him deserve to burn in hell..And at the rate he is going even up till now to whoever his new bitch is he sure will..FUCK him and his fucked up mind..And the one who may be bearing his child now..Yeah she or he can get it too..Fuck that motherfucker..May his children never see him when he die..And even if they did may they thank God for that..May he never rest in peace.. Something kind of funny happened as we wanted to move off..Started Balqis but when kicked to gear one she just died..Throttled hard a few times but it still happened..Damn..It wasn't funny..It shouldn't be when it's getting dark and you cant start your form of transport at the graveyard..Well it did became funny when the problem came to light..It was actually the stand!..hahahahahahaha..See Balqis has this feature in her that if the stand is never brought up she will die just like that..Hahahhahaha..Me and my beloved were relieved and laughing at the same time..Heehee..Went to Tan Tock Seng Hospital after that..Visited a child of a family friend of her's as he was involved in a 2 machined accident..Looked kinda bad..7 bones kinda snapped at rib cage..And he can't move that much as it will hurt..And opposite his bed was also involved in a 2 machine accident..More and more needless accidents are taking place..I had lost a friend through an accident like that..It hurts..And i wouldn't want to see anymore like that if given a choice..Choices are not for me for only HE decides everything..After the visit she went back with her parents while i so called wanted to meet my friends..The meeting never happened..Just a bad case of communication..Fuck that..Oh well..Everything's changing now..Keep up with the time i guess..So went over to my beloved's place and did the normal routine..Was playing sims all the way!..Well not all the way but most of the time..Hehehe..But i was so hooked until i went back at5 am in the morning..When was the last time that happened..Hah..And today..Need to cut my hair a little..Planning to chill out with the guys later..Let's hope this happens..
Here comes the rain again,
Falling from the stars.
Drenched in my pain again,
Becoming who we are.
As my memory rest,
But never forgets what I lost.
Wake me up when September ends.
Write with no regret
4:27:00 PM
